Firsts!!!

So over the last week or so we have had a multitude of FIRSTS in the Kirsch love shack! Let me just start by saying we finally had our first post baby night out together. Unfortunately we were celebrating my ever increasing age. Yep I just turned 29! I also spilled red wine everywhere. If wasting one of man's most delicious creations wasnt bad enough, let me make it worse, it found its way all over my neighbors new dress. Cheers!!

I know you must be excited seeing the picture below BUT before you tinkle in your panties....this picture is a one horse pony. Hasn't happened since.

Marlee had her first taste of cereal. And she hates it.

We had our first trip to the park where Mar embarked on her first swing ride. Of course mini Thor was there to protect her.

We also had our first beach trip of the season and it was rather lovely.

The last 2 weeks have been pretty flawless until yesterday. Yesterday I took it up the tailpipe from Supercuts and boy do I have a mouthful!!

until next time......;0)

REALITY

Expectations vs. Reality

There is one thing that I know for certain and it’s that I knew NOTHING about motherhood.

Expectation #1  Your baby, your precious bundle of joy, has changed your life for the better in so many ways. REALITY #1 Your baby turns into a blood sucking goblin every night at around 3 AM. Nobody ever told me that!!

Expectation # 2  You expect to change about 5 poopy diapers a day. REALITY # 2  Babies come equipped with c02 cartridges in their butthole so they are able to shoot poop across the room OR to have explosive craps that require you to cut off your $30 onsie that you had saved for a special occasion.

Expectation # 3  You are young. You will snap back in no time. REALITY #3  Well that part is true. I totally fit back into my size 2’s if you don’t count the three inches of muffin top on each side and the hole where the button used to be before it broke off.

Expectation #4  My husband is going to be the best father ever. After all he is smart charming and handsome. REALITY #4  Suddenly your husband becomes dumb as rocks and you ask yourself “Really? Did I really marry this douchbag?” And then you will find yourself grinding up apple seeds and putting it in his food. (you know because it’s a natural source of arsenic.)

And then there are the stupid questions and statements that normally wouldn’t bother you but after months of no sleep you might just karate chop that person in the neck….Like…

“You had your baby?” Uhhh DUH!

“You look tired.” Uhhh DUH!

“You should really take time to yourself.” Well what would you like me to do? Buy a crate? Put the child in my trunk? Lock her in the bathroom?

“You look great for having a baby.” So if I didn’t have a baby I look…….?

Nobody ever tells a new mommy about how her hormones are going to fluctuate so bad that you have to buy a wig to hide the bald spots or wear pads under your armpits because of the uncontrollable sweating. And what about the cellulite?  Can I have a side of pineapple with that?

Nobody ever tells a new mommy about the blood transfusion that she will need after weeks and weeks of bleeding or that fact that engorged breasts actually hurts more than having a leg cut off slowly with a spork.

 Well let me fill you in….Babies are bloodsucking goblins with c02 buttholes, you will have a muffin top and cellulite, your husband will be increasingly more dumb for about a year, people are rude and love to state the obvious and don’t donate blood.

Love Your Raging Hormones<3

And remember...This too shall pass;)

Heaven

"Heaven"

If there is one thing I know for sure by this place, it’s that God really does exist. If you ever have doubts and need to restore your faith all you need to do is look at this.

I refer to this place as heaven, and in my mind, this is what heaven looks like. I find myself swept away by the sounds of the waves crashing and descending back into the endless shades of blue. Nothing sooths the soul like a little warmth and sunshine. I have created many beautiful memories in “Heaven” and I have captured most of them so enjoy!!!

 Its where my son dipped his toes into one of Gods most amazing creations for the first time!
I will never forget that moment.

 Its a place where I married the love of my life and a place that reminds me how much I love him. It makes me fall in love over and over again.

I have watched my first born grow up in a "Heaven" and I cannot wait to introduce my sweet baby girl to a place that will be her home for years to come.

I thank God for each and every blessing in my life. Although life is not at all perfect I am grateful for all of it.

Until next time....

Purple Umbrella

There it sat, tattered and bent, semi floating on top of his pool. I felt my blood start to boil and I could feel my cheeks get hot. Before I could even take a couple of breaths he flashed me a wink and jumped into his pool. The only thing that I could now see was flecks of blue and green and an ocean of eyelashes. How could I be upset now! Great! Then it happened, he flashed a smile and it was all over from there. I totally forgot about that worthless umbrella and the only thing that I could see was pure joy beaming from this beautiful child. My once perfect purple umbrella had no meaning, in fact, I would buy him three more to destroy. I realize that material things have no importance to me. Everything that I do, that I work hard for is my family. Otherwise there would be no reason to work at all. Moments like these make me realize how blessed I am and that the sacrifices that I make for my children allow me to have these moment. Afterall its more fun to dance in the rain than run from it.

Until next time,
Mommy Lynn Kirsch